


Explosions (It Will Never Be The Same)

by SpicyPepper_SweetSugar



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: AU, F/M, obviously, since I don't seem to be able to write anything else
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-06
Updated: 2014-05-06
Packaged: 2018-01-23 18:58:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1576079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpicyPepper_SweetSugar/pseuds/SpicyPepper_SweetSugar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One night changes everything for Oliver and Felicity. [AU, obviously, since I can't seem to write anything else! ;)]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Explosions (It Will Never Be The Same)

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!  
> So I finished writing this little thing yesterday after having it half-finished on my computer for quite some time. It's different from what I've written before, but I hope you like it! :)

" **Explosions (It Will Never Be The Same)"**

**Word count: 5,031**

* * *

 

**I.**

The door to the Foundry opened and both Diggle and Oliver who had been in the middle of an aggressive sparring session, stopped dead in their tracks.

There was barely a sound heard except for light footsteps as Felicity appeared on the foot of the stairs. Diggle, threw a towel over his sweaty shoulders and glanced at Oliver, who looked as if he wanted to punch a hole in the wall. Felicity, who was now on their level, stared at them without saying a word.

It seemed like time was frozen between the three of them.

"Felicity!"

Oliver's voice rang out through the Foundry, making Felicity jump and stare at him with wide eyes. It had even shocked Diggle, the way his tone seemed to be dripping in poison when he had spoken his friend's name. Before Diggle could make a move to stop him, Oliver had stridden over to stand in front of Felicity, towering over her. She was glaring at the floor, refusing to look up at him. He caught her upper arm, much harder than necessary.

"Oliver I really don't want to do this right now," she said, her voice thick. His tight grip on her arm made her wince, more internally than externally.

"Where the hell were you?" Oliver snarled. "You've been gone for  _a month_. You didn't even leave a message!"

The anger in his tone seemed mixed with a little bit of relief, which it was. Oliver and Diggle had been going out of their minds, searching for Felicity every single day and night since she had gone missing without a trace. Oliver had gone as far as going to his Bratva contacts for any information on his... _friend._

"Oliver, you're hurting me," Felicity whimpered, bringing Oliver back from wherever his mind had gone.

"Oliver," Diggle said, trying to stay calm, "let her go."

"No Diggle! Not until she explains where the hell she's been all this time!" He turned back to Felicity, his eyes narrowing. "You have a lot of explaining to do."

His tone made Felicity's heart clench and caused her lip to tremble. All she wanted to do, was go home and curl up in a ball and wish for it all to go away.

"I needed some time for myself," she told them, finally looking up.

"You needed some  _time_?"

"Felicity," Diggle said, stepping forward, interrupting Oliver's outburst completely. "You acted distant for three whole weeks and then you suddenly disappeared for a month, without even a text message. You have to give us more than that you 'needed time.'"

Oliver was still holding her arm and his touch seemed to be burning her to the bone. She couldn't talk about this. Not now; not when Diggle was here. What was she supposed to say? How much did he know? Had Oliver told him anything?

Once again, tears filled her eyes, but she shook her head, pulling away from Oliver as she turned back to her bag and started unpacking her things.

Oliver watched her carefully. The place where he'd had his hand was red and he regretted hurting her. For a moment, he closed his eyes and tried to bottle up the anger and hurt that had built up inside of him for over a month. He needed to speak with her in private. If this was about  _that_ night, he needed to know.

He turned to Diggle and just looked at him for a few seconds. The older man had a questioning look on his face, but finally sighed, shaking his head.

"How about I go get us something to eat?" Diggle said, obviously trying to lighten the mood and get away from his two friends. "I'll be back in half an hour." As he passed Oliver, he muttered a low "Calm down," before walking out of the foundry, leaving Oliver and Felicity alone.

The air around them was electrifying. Neither wanted to make the first mood. Oliver was afraid that he might snap at her again, while Felicity feared that she might break down completely if she opened her mouth.

"Felicity," Oliver said after a while. He was still angry with her for leaving without telling them or leaving them a message, but yet, he couldn't deny that he was happy she was alive. Both he and Diggle had used every resource that they had to try and track her down, but when they realized she'd covered up her tracks perfectly, Diggle had pointed out that she clearly didn't want to be found. The anger and betrayal still ate Oliver up from inside though, and he'd had many sleepless nights since she had left them, wondering if it was his fault that she'd left in the first place.

"I'm sorry, Oliver," Felicity whispered, not daring to look at him. "I am so, so sorry..."

"Is this about that night?" Oliver asked, finally feeling the anger fade as he heard how broken she sounded. "I need you to tell me the truth."

"In a way, yes," she replied. Oliver watched her trembling lip and for a moment, he wanted nothing else than to just step forward and forgive her for leaving them all behind. Yet, he stayed put, neither moving closer, nor stepping further away.

"What do you mean 'in a way'?" Oliver questioned, his hands balling into fists. She looked up at him and this time he  _did_ take a step forward. "We  _slept_  together," he said, his voice hushed as if Diggle would walk in at any minute. "We agreed that it was better it didn't happen again and then you  _left_  after  _three weeks_. Tell me  _why,_ " he demanded.

Felicity stared into his eyes as her hand slowly traveled from her side toward her abdomen. Oliver followed her movement at first but when her hand stopped on her stomach, he quickly looked away. His blood was turning to ice as time seemed to freeze over.

"I'm pregnant, Oliver," Felicity whispered. "That's why I left."

He couldn't look at her and he seemed to have lost the ability to breathe. Without thinking, he turned on his heel and calmly walked out of the Foundry, slamming the door behind him loud enough to make Felicity jump.

It didn't take long for Felicity to break down in tears after he'd left.

**II.**

Oliver disappeared for two days after Felicity told him the truth to why she left.

She spent most of those two days crying at home, keeping up her new searches in the Foundry and avoiding her day job like it was contaminated by the plague. She couldn't just go back there after a month's absence.  _Especially_  considering the fact that her boss was missing. Truthfully, she didn't even know what she was going to do whenever he decided to return. Diggle had tried talking to her, but she refused to tell him anything until she knew for sure what Oliver wanted. Considering the fact that he hadn't called or texted her back when she'd tried to reach him, it wasn't looking very bright. She wondered if he was punishing her, in a way, for leaving him and Diggle behind without a word.

What she hadn't expected, however, was to wake up early in the morning, only to see Oliver sitting in the armchair in the corner of her bedroom. Quickly, she sat up, forgetting for a moment that she was sleeping in a tank-top and a pair of shorts. The coldness hit her suddenly and she wrapped her comforter around her, looking over at the window that was open.

It was clear that he had sneaked in sometime during the night, but he didn't look as if he had gotten any sleep at all as he stared at her blatantly.

"Oliver," she said, her throat sore and her voice thick from crying so much. She reached over to her nightstand and turned on the light.

He opened his mouth as if to say something, but nothing came out. Shaking his head a few times, he drew his fingers through his hair before burying his head in his hands. "I had a right to know," he whispered, so low that she for a second thought she'd heard him wrong.

"I'm sorry, Oliver," she said, repeating what she had said two days ago in the Foundry.

"I had a right to know, Felicity!" he snapped, this time a little louder.

She wouldn't let herself to be phased by the evident anger that was once again filling him. Truthfully, she was beginning to feel her own ire boiling up inside of her.

"You  _left_ ," he said. "You left without telling me  _anything!_  How long did you know?" He was glaring at her, but now she could see that it was more hurt than anger speaking.

"A week before I left," she admitted. "I took a pregnancy test when I was late and it came out positive. Then I tried it again, and again, and again, with the same result."

" _A week_ ," Oliver repeated, letting out a strained laugh. "You knew for  _a week_  and you couldn't think of any way to tell me that I got you pregnant? How the hell is it even possible? We used protection, didn't we? You said you were on the pill!"

Was he accusing her?

"Sometimes things aren't one hundred percent bullet proof, Oliver!" she snapped back, raising her voice slightly. She moved closer to him and sat at the foot of her bed. "And what did you expect me to do? Tell you that 'Congratulations, Oliver! We're going to have a baby after a one night stand that was fueled by low inhibitions and an adrenaline rush'?"

"You should have  _told me_ , Felicity," Oliver sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, frustrated by her outburst.

"And what would you have done? Told me again that it was a mistake, much like you did that night?" she asked.

"We  _both_  agreed that it was a mistake," Oliver protested, but she held her hand up to stop him from speaking.

"You were the one who said it, Oliver. I never actually agreed, but you pretty much  _ran_  out of the room before I could say anything," she said. Her hand moved absentmindedly to her stomach, which he was refusing to look at. "You told me that sleeping with me was a mistake and that it shouldn't happen again. I didn't want you to label  _our child_  a mistake too, so that is why I didn't tell you." She fell silent and he still refused to look at her.

They sat there, without saying a word to each other, but she could see regret flashing through his eyes. The only problem was that she didn't know whether it was the fact that he'd called their night together a mistake that he regretted, or that he had ever given in and slept with her.

**III.**

_His fingers were still tangled in her hair when they finally came down from their high, panting and staring at each other. For a brief moment, Felicity was happy. It felt like everything had_ finally _fallen into place and her lips began tugging up in a smile as he dropped his head to rest in the crook of her neck, inhaling deeply._

_Then suddenly, Oliver rolled off of her and they stared up at the ceiling of her bedroom without speaking. She thought about moving closer to him, still craving his warmth, but suddenly, his hands flew up to cover his face._

" _What have we done?"_

_His question made both her heart and her smile to drop. She watched as Oliver sat up and began pulling on his boxers and then his shirt and then the rest of his clothes that they had discarded in their throw of passion._

" _I'm sorry, Felicity," he told her. "We shouldn't have done this._ I  _shouldn't have done thing... It was a mistake. A mistake we can't make again, or..." he trailed off and Felicity swallowed thickly._

" _Oliver," she said, reaching for him as she sat up in her bed, clutching the covers to her chest. "It's okay."_

" _No, Felicity, it's not," Oliver protested. "This could have ruined us and I really hope it doesn't, but you know that I can't..."_

Be with someone I could really care about.

_He didn't seem to be able to put his thoughts into words._

" _We can't," he concluded._

_'But we already have,' she wanted to say, but remained silent as her tongue seemed to turn to led in her mouth. She wanted to tell him that she'd never been happier than a couple of minutes ago and that she didn't regret a single thing, because her feeling for him were_ true _and she wanted him and never wanted to let him go._

" _We should just forget about tonight," Oliver told her. "Can we do that, Felicity?" he asked, not really looking at her. "I'm sorry," he repeated as he walked out of the bedroom, not waiting to hear her response. She heard the door slam shut downstairs and laid down again on her bed._

_Her pillow still smelled like him in the morning and as she buried her face in it and inhaled, she felt the first couple of tears fall down her cheeks._

**IV.**

There wasn't much they agreed on.

They had fought and made up on several occasions since they had gotten to know each other but as Felicity drove them to the Foundry, they both agreed that silence was better than yelling at each other for something they had both been a part of.

Felicity had told him that she wanted the baby and that it was up to him if he wanted to be a parent or not. She'd told him that the kid would never have to know who his or her father was if he didn't want to, and he had given her an incredulous look, but hadn't said anything.

Truthfully, it hurt.

But probably not as much as Oliver's jaw hurt after they told Diggle.

**V.**

Oliver promised her that he would stay by her side through all of it after Diggle told him to get a grip. It took a day or two, but when they were alone in the Foundry when Diggle was on a food run, Oliver walked up to her and gently put his hand on her shoulder.

It was kind of bittersweet, since it didn't feel like it usually did between them, but Felicity took what she could get.

"I'm with you in this," Oliver had told her. "I won't leave you."

"I know."

**VI.**

Thea's reaction was...different, to say the least.

"You got your secretary pregnant?" she screeched, staring at her brother and the blonde in front of her. Roy, who was sitting next to Thea snickered and the younger Queen sibling elbowed him in the gut.

"Actually, she's my executive assistant," Oliver corrected, looking at Felicity, who nodded. "And she's my friend too, which you know very well."

"So, just because Felicity's your  _friend_ and she helps you with your  _nightly activities_ , it's okay to make a baby together?" Thea asked skeptically, crossing her arms over her chest.

Thea had been in on their secret for some time now, but she still hadn't gotten used to the idea of her brother roaming the streets at night as the vigilante who had once put an arrow through her boyfriend's knee. She knew Felicity, but neither of them had time to hang out more than the necessary social event which meant that they weren't exactly  _close_.

"It wasn't exactly  _planned_ ," Oliver sighed, pinching the brig of his nose.

"Didn't mom and dad have the safe sex talk with you?" Thea wondered. "I mean, of course they did because otherwise you would have already spawned little Oliver's..."

"Thea," Oliver warned. "Felicity and I have agreed to keep the baby."

" _What?_ Are you two together now or something? No offense," she quickly added, looking at Felicity.

Oliver looked at Felicity again, but his friend kept her eyes trained on Thea. He couldn't help but feel his stomach flip when he noticed that her hand was resting over her still flat stomach... Almost as if she wanted to protect the baby-  _their child_ \- from hearing Thea's harsh words.

"No, we're not together," Oliver said. "Not in that sense... But we have agreed that we are having this baby and that's something you're going to have to accept, Thea."

"Oliver," Thea sighed, leaning closer. "You better know what you're doing. I know I'm younger than you, but I want to remind you of just how messed up our family is," she said.

"You don't have to inform me of that," Oliver swallowed.

"Both mom and dad are gone," Thea continued anyway. "It's been just you and me and occasionally Walter. Malcolm Merlin came and went and Starling City hasn't been as safe as it once was for years. You run around at night, shooting arrows at criminals which means that the baby will always be at risk if someone finds out the truth about you. This kid deserves happiness and to be loved and I won't let it have anything less than that."

Silence fell upon them again.

"What are you saying exactly, Thea?" Felicity finally spoke up. Oliver glanced at her again. She'd been quiet all this time and hearing her voice somehow sounded foreign.

"I'm saying that if my brother messes things up with his kid, I'll beat the living crap out of him," Thea answered. "After all, I am supposed to be the cool aunt, aren't I?"

Felicity couldn't help the smile that blossomed on her face. She turned to grin at Oliver, only to find that he was already looking at her, smiling lightly as well.

"This family has suffered enough," Thea said thoughtfully, reaching over to take Felicity's hand in hers. "I just hope that you and this baby will change things."

Oliver looked down at Felicity's stomach.

Things would never be the same.

**VII.**

"God!" Felicity exclaimed, shutting her eyes tightly. "That's cold."

Oliver stood by the far wall, leaning against it while Diggle sat in the chair next to him.

"I warned you about it," the doctor chuckled as he continued to smear the gel on her stomach. She was glad she wasn't showing yet because otherwise, she figured she would be feeling a lot more awkward than she already was. "Don't worry though, it'll pass soon enough."

"Yeah, I know," Felicity said through clenched teeth, opening her eyes again, already feeling the cold fade.

"Have you had a check up before?" the doctor asked.

"Yes, in Central City," Felicity nodded. "Or wait, it wasn't a check up exactly. It was more of a 'lets check if I'm pregnant for real with doctors that don't know me'-thing," she said. " _Not_ that I have anything to hide! Because, I mean, ask me anything and I'll reply. Wait, not  _anything_ , obviously. A girl has got to have some secrets-"

"Felicity," Diggle chuckled. "I think you answered the doctor's question just fine."

"Indeed you did," the doctor smiled politely, bringing over a strange looking machine. "Now, Ms. Smoak, when I put this to your belly, I'll look around a bit until I hear a heartbeat and then, hopefully we'll get to see your baby," he explained.

"I understand how an ultrasound works," Felicity said, sounding a little offended.

Oliver figured she probably was, which made him smile. The woman was a genius after all.

"Of course you do," the doctor agreed. "Now let's see if we can find your baby..." he said.

Oliver watched patiently as the doctor moved the device around on Felicity's stomach. His hands were feeling clammy all of the sudden and it felt like every second that passed weighed down on his chest, making it hard to breathe.

"Hmm..." the doctor hummed, moving around some more.

"Is something wrong, doctor?" Felicity asked, her voice shaky.

The only thing they could hear was static.

Oliver held his breath, his eyes focusing on Felicity's face.

_Thump-thump. Thump-thump._

"Everything seems to be just fine, Ms. Smoak," the doctor smiled. "The little one was just hiding, it seems."

Oliver relaxed, his heart filling with warmth instantly as he saw the smile that graced Felicity's face.

"And here it your baby," the doctor said, pointing at something on the screen. He looked up at Oliver and Diggle. "I just need to fill in some charts and then I'll be right back," he told them. "I'll have a nurse come and help clean Ms. Smoak up."

"Thank you," Felicity whispered, staring at the screen with wide eyes. Oliver and Diggle walked over to stand by her side. "That's our baby," she said, touching the blotch on the screen. "There's a baby growing inside of me."

The amazement she was feeling seemed to be contagious, since Oliver couldn't take his eyes off of the screen either.

He had been a killer once, taking lives when it was necessary to protect others. He'd vowed to never take another life, and he'd broken his promise when he'd saved the woman who was now carrying his child.

The life he had helped create.

Deep inside, something was stirring, but Oliver wasn't yet one hundred percent sure what it was... The only thing he knew was that not all of the emotions he was feeling were bad.

**VIII.**

Oliver had never touched Felicity's stomach.

She, however, constantly rested one of her hands against it.

Felicity was five months pregnant when it happened though.

She was down in the Foundry, keeping an eye on Oliver through the security cameras of Starling National Bank. A couple of low life criminals from Gotham had been making heists throughout the country, recently arriving in Starling City. Since some of the small banks in the city had been robbed, it didn't take long for the team to figure out that the National Bank was next.

"I have an eye on them, Oliver," Felicity said, her fingers moving over her keyboard. "They've disabled the alarm system and the cameras on the east side of the bank."

" _That's where the main vault is,_ " Oliver pointed out.

"Yes," Felicity confirmed. "I've enabled the cameras again, so I have an eye on them. Should I put the alarm system up again or do you want to handle them and get out before triggering the alarm to tip the cops off?"

" _You can wait another minute. I don't want them to trigger the alarm and run off before I catch them,_ " Oliver instructed.

"Copy that," Felicity replied. "Three of them are heading toward the vault so two of them must be outside. Diggle?"

" _I'm on it, Felicity,_ " Diggle responded.

Half an hour later, the five criminals were tied up inside of the bank vault, a green arrow with an USB-device hanging from it with information on which account the money they had stolen so far ended up, courtesy of Felicity.

Oliver and Diggle hurried back to the Foundry and Felicity stood up as soon as they entered, a bright smile on her face.

"Team Arrow wins again," she beamed at them. "We're one well-oiled team, aren't we?" Her hands were on her protruding stomach, rubbing it gently. Diggle walked up to her and kissed her cheek.

"We'd be nothing without you," he told her. She smiled at him as he headed for the bathroom before she turned to Oliver.

"You weren't hurt, were you?" she asked, her smile dropping slightly as he pulled back his hood to reveal a small cut above his eye.

"It's nothing big," Oliver shrugged. "One of the thugs managed to get in a punch."

"I'll get you an ice-pack," Felicity frowned, heading over to the small freezer they had installed just for situations like these. Oliver sat down on the examination table and waited for her while he watched her.

Her belly had grown quite a bit since she'd been at her first ultrasound. She had had several other check-ups and everything was going along just fine. Oliver and she had grown a bit closer too, working on the slight hiccup their friendship had had when they'd first found out that Felicity was pregnant.

His eyes flashed to the black and white picture that was taped to one of Felicity's computers and thought of the same picture that he secretly held in his wallet. Thea had insisted they all get copies, so they had something to remind them of why they do what they do.

Felicity walked back to him with a bag of ice in her hand, gently putting it over his eye.

"How are you feeling?" he asked her after a minute of silence. It had become a thing for them; sitting in silence.

"Good," Felicity nodded, sitting down next to him. "My back hurts a little, but that's to be expected. I mean, I  _hate_  the fact that I can't fit in my favorite dress anymore, so I'll have to take up my membership at the gym again after I-  _Oh._ "

Her mouth fell open and her hand dropped to her stomach.

"What?" Oliver asked, dropping the bag of ice, instantly on alert. "Is everything okay?"

Felicity's mouth was still shaped as an 'o', but she nodded. "Yes, yes. I just-  _Oh!_ " she exclaimed again, shifting slightly in her seat. Oliver stood up.

"Felicity?" he asked as a small smile slowly spread across her face.

"The baby's kicking," she grinned up at him.

"What?"

"The baby is kicking!" she exclaimed happily, touching her stomach again. Without thinking, she reached for Oliver's hand and pressed it against her stomach.

Oliver froze up for a second, until he felt a light pressure against his palm. Her hand was still over his and the emotions that spread through his body, felt incredible. He dropped to his knees in front of her and she looked down at him with tears in her eyes as she smiled happily at him.

Then, her smile dropped. "Oh, God, I'm sorry, Oliver," she said. "I didn't think. I don't want you to feel any pressure. I'm sorry, I was just so happy, I..." she trailed off as Oliver's eyes settled on her stomach and he gently rubbed it with his thumb.

"Our baby is kicking," Oliver said, his throat thick. "It's  _our_  kid, Felicity." He looked up at her, smiling, just like she had done a few moments ago.

She let out a breath of relief, feeling like they had finally broken the barrier that they had both been setting up between them. "Yes," she smiled. "It's our baby."

Oliver stood up and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"I swear, I will never let anything happen to the two of you," he whispered and she could have sworn she had felt a tear fall from his eye down on her head.

Their foreheads were still touching when Diggle came back and their hands were still intertwined, resting over her belly.

**IX.**

After feeling their child kick for the first time, Felicity and Oliver only grew closer. It was all a whirlwind of emotions really. Before they knew it, they were hanging out every single day, looking through baby books together and eating dinner every evening with Thea and Roy before driving to the Foundry.

They were sitting on her couch watching a movie one night, when Oliver told her that he had been wrong.

"What are you talking about?" Felicity asked, putting the french fries and the banana-strawberry smoothie aside. She'd been having a lot of different cravings lately, but Oliver made sure she got everything she wanted.

"I was wrong to call us a mistake, Felicity," he told her again. "You and this baby are probably the best thing that has ever happened to me. I'm just sorry I didn't realize it until now."

His hand came to rest on top of her stomach and she snuggled in closer to his side.

"I was wrong to run, Oliver," Felicity said. "We have both made mistakes when it comes to dealing with our relationship. The good thing is that we're back on track now."

"I want to stay on that track, Felicity," Oliver said, taking her hand in his.

"What are you saying, Oliver?"

"I don't want to scare you," he said quickly, seeing the alarm in her eyes as she put some distance between them. "The other night, when you fell asleep on the couch while waiting up for me... I realized something."

Felicity watched him warily, "What did you realize?"

Oliver smiled lightly at her. "That I'm stupid and that I love you," he replied.

"Are you stupid for loving me, or stupid for not realizing that you love me sooner?" Felicity asked, once again moving closer to him.

"The latter," he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "You don't have to feel any pressure though. I just wanted you to know that I know what I want now...and I hope that at least on some level, you want the same thing."

Felicity tilted her head sideways and looked at him, her expression unreadable. "And what do you want, Oliver?"

He didn't hesitate for a second. "I want you. You and our baby. I want us to be a family and I want us to be happy together," he listed.

"You mean like we are now?" she questioned, intertwining their hands.

"Yes."

"We're on the same page then."

"We are?"

"Yes."

"You mean-?"

"Yes, Oliver. I love you too. Now kiss me before I decide your stupidity and my level of genius aren't compatible."

"As you wish."

**X.**

Felicity cradled the little girl in her hands, tears running down her face. She looked up at Oliver, who looked breathless.

"It's our baby, Oliver," she cried happily. "It's our baby girl."

"It is," Oliver swallowed, leaning down to press a kiss to Felicity's lips. "She's our beautiful baby girl." His finger brushed the infants dark blonde hair. "I love you so much, both of you."

"I love you too," Felicity responded. "Both of you."

**§**

Things never were the same after Olivia Queen was born, but Oliver couldn't be happier about it.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are golden! :)


End file.
